I was interviewed, this morning, on how cell phones are negatively impacting relationships by Laura Moody on Fox 13 Good Morning Tampa Bay.
Here are the key points I discussed in the interview:
The Negatives:
- Arguing or discussing difficult issues with your partner via text. So many things can be assumed or missed such as your tone, meaning, and intent. These types of miscommunication can make matters much worse.
- You’re constantly “on”. This prevents you from relaxing and being present and in the moment with your partner.
- Energy and time drainer. Repeatedly checking your phone saps your mental energy and time, leaving less time and energy for your partner and relationship.
- “Where the attention goes, the energy flows.” This is one of your favorite quotes because it explains it all. If you are constantly on your phone, checking email, etc. when you are with your partner, where is the energy going…to the phone…not your partner. It takes your attention away from your partner or person you’re with and sends the message to them that they aren’t important or that your bored, etc. Remember, close proximity to your partner doesn’t mean quality time.
What To Do:
- Create “No Phone Zones”. In other words, create healthy boundaries surrounding your cell phone use. Set healthy limits on where you will use your phone and for how long. When you’re out with your partner, put the cell phone away or turn it off.
- Be Present. Start a new habit of focusing your attention on one thing at a time. So, if you’re with your partner at dinner, be present and focus your attention on them.
- Use it as part of foreplay! So, if you want to use your cell phone, send your partner love notes and/or sexy and flirty text messages through out the day.
What are your thoughts on this? Do you think cell phones are negatively impacting relationships? And what are your biggest pet peeves when it comes to cell phone use? We would love to hear from you!