You wake up in the middle of the night to strange noises and screams outside of your house. You look outside and see bloody people running everywhere, your neighbor’s house is on fire and your car is surrounded by zombies. You only have a few moments to gather life saving supplies. How do you choose? We are here to help. You don’t want to be caught off guard.
Those of you that are fans of the AMC show The Walking Dead, like we are, know you should always be prepared for a zombie apocalypse. As Sexologists, we often discuss the sexual health and wellness benefits of sex toys. However, we bet you never thought the benefits would include zombie survival!
Our zombie apocalypse sex toy survival kit is just perfect to not only ensure your sex life will survive, but could also save your life against zombies. We are here to help you think outside of your sex toy box. To help you get started, here are the top 5 must haves for your zombie apocalypse sex toy survival kit:
1. Nick Hawk™ GIGOLO Tie Me Up & Tease Me™ Kit
This kit is a must have! It comes with 20.75 feet of rope, a blind fold, weighted stainless steel kegel balls and a feather tickler. So, you can use the rope to do lots of survival things such as repel down a cliff, make a booby trap, and hold things together when needed. You can use the blind fold to help you get the much needed sleep. You can use the weighted kegel balls as ammo in sling shot and the feather tickler as a paint brush to send messages to other people (beats getting your hand all bloody!). And when things are quiet, you can still get a little kinky with your partner!
2. Remote Control 10-Function Little Black Panty™ and Apollo™ Boxer with C-Ring
You need the perfect underwear in a zombie apocalypse. For ladies, we suggest the Remote Control 10-Function Little Black Panty™. Not only is this panty stretchy and comfortable especially when running from zombies, but it also comes with a 10 function vibrating, body forming bullet! So, you can still feel sexy, have pleasure and survive! For guys, we recommend the Apollo™ Boxer with C-Ring. This boxer is stretchy, comfortable, and comes with a built-in removable enhancer ring. This ring can help you not only maintain an erection in stressful, apocalyptic times, but can also be used with the rope mentioned above.
3. Scandal™ Ball Gag and Scandal™ Collar with Leash
Pet Zombie Supplies! If you want to be like Michonne in The Walking Dead and have pet zombies, you will definitely want these in your survival kit. Okay, not only does the ball gag and collar with leash help you with erotic play but these can be used to stop your pet zombies from getting away and biting you!
4. Waterproof Glow-In-The-Dark Stud ®
This is a 7 inch, waterproof, multi-speed vibrating dildo that also glows in the dark. You definitely need a light source in the zombie apocalypse! So, you can light up the night and have lots of fun!! Plus, it’s a great way to keep your batteries dry. Extra bonus!
5. Love Poker™ Game
When things are quiet, you are likely to get bored. Thus, this game can open the door to passion, rekindle romance, strip away inhibitions, and encourage great dialogue between you and your lover. Boredom solved!
We hope this helps. So don’t wait…take the time to start preparing your zombie sex toy survival kit now! What sex toys/aids would you add to the zombie sex toy survival kit and why?